Here are some random thoughts on past choices. Were these choices always random choices? Were they choices at all? Is a life really like a CV with a CV’s ordered control?
For example, why did I go to Italy in January 1976 and stay there for three years? I tell myself that it suited my personality at the time. After all, I was young, adventurous, exuberant and fiery, wasn’t I? At least, this is what I tell myself.
Now, I live in Germany. Life here is staid, quiet and suits me in middle to old age. Is it really like this or am I making up stories. To put it another way, am I interpreting my present life to suit and explain the past?
So – how should we remember the past? Should we revisit it or reevaluate it? And is re-evaluation an illusion? Perhaps, we should forget about the past and focus on the present. Do we have a choice?
Julian Barnes engages brilliantly with these questions in his novel, The Sense of an Ending. Barnes shows how memory shapes our personal history and identity. At the same time, he shows us how we often distort the reality of what we did and why we did it. This distortion, if uncovered, can fundamentally alter our sense of who we are.
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